Saturday, December 27, 2008

Inappropriate Behavior

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…autism can be a wicked thing. One of the core deficits is the inability to understand social cues and norms. Throw high anxiety levels and an inability to see another’s point of view into the equation and you’ve got quite the behavioral mess.

Until recently, Alex was in a steady stream of trouble at school for inappropriately touching (little taps or pats), and in moments of high anxiety, hitting and kicking other kids.

He knows on an intellectual level that he should not hit, but his urges and impulses are strong and he has had a very hard time controlling himself, especially when under stress.

When he’s happy to see his classmates, he may pat them because he doesn’t know how else to express his excitement. There’s a positive side to this - it means he’s starting to enjoy and care for others in a deeper way. At other times, if he’s touched or brushed in to, he’ll do a “touch back” (a compulsion to make the interaction even perhaps?). When he’s in rare form, he’ll yell, start singing and refuse to do his work.

It is so very hard to separate the behavior of my child from myself. I find myself tensing daily as I pick him up from school, wondering if today has been yet another “bad” day.

Our team at school had a meeting and we came up with a plan that we hope and pray will remedy this situation. Alex has been temporarily removed from his typical classroom to a special ed class. The special ed teacher has graciously volunteered to train one full time aide to assist Alex with his struggles with behavior and schoolwork. Alex is also receiving help with self-control and we are proud of the progress he has made.

He will return to his regular ed class after winter break for short periods of time gradually increasing to the full day. If need be, he can regroup back in the special ed class.

Since Alex learned he had to leave his regular ed class for a while, he’s been very emotional. We can’t hear enough about how he wants to return and about how much he loves his 1st grade teacher. I think everyone in the entire school knows Alex loves his first grade teacher!

As much as I hate to see Alex sad, I find it wonderful that he is experiencing so much emotion and love for others. Also, his love for his class and teacher has been a good motivator for him to display self-control.

We are grateful for this new plan and pray that it, coupled with his therapy and the help and care he receives at home will turn this situation around.

2 comments:

kristenhen said...

So glad that an interest in others is growing! It's something that can't really be taught- we can teach skills for what to do to be appropriate when you interact, but you can't force someone to be interested in others. That desire is coming from Alex!

Again, I'm glad to see another entry from you!

dmorrow1 said...

Hey Molly!
Kudos to you & Jon for keeping on being the great parents that Alex needs. I can't even imagine what a minute by minute struggle it is for you. I see Jon walking Alex to school, and he is so patient with him. I'm sure your experiences are an encouragement to others who have the same struggles.
love, Dawn